Good news!

There is no longer any need for me to worry! All concern has left me! My prayers have been answered! There is a church that understands my predicament and meets my needs. All is revealed on an Indian church-network's website that I was reading, and particularly in this statement:

While the universal and general purpose for all people would be to pursue a married life, in certain cases and under special conditions, God's purposes and values are also fulfilled in those who by the Spirit's gifting, live and serve God as single people.
God especially covers and supplies the widow and the orphan and places single people under the protection of house-holds within the local church.

Amen.

This specific passage is titled the 'Value of Being Single'. Reading it I can't help but feel valued.

Of course should I not be feeling so valued as a single individual, that's also okay! They have handy forms that you can fill out for your pastor to circulate in the search for a suitable companion. After the first chaperoned date a marriage decision must be made within six months. No problem, after all the 'universal and general purpose for all people' is to pursue marriage so anything that helps the process along is a welcome relief.

Unfortunately the church I go to at the moment is not as accommodating. I've heard rumours of 'bio-forms' that can be filled out to find that perfect match but the initiative seems to rest more with the single seeker. Until I begin the pursuit then I must be content with staying in the youth group. It's only fitting, anyone who isn't married is not a complete human being and is therefore still a youth. Sure you may be fifty but you're not married and that's just a bit odd isn't it? Stay in the youth for now, child, and when you finally come to your sense you can join in with the adults. And don't have the audacity to complain, it's not our fault you're not normal.

So there's no pressure to get married at all. You'll just get asked in every single conversation, every day, by everyone you meet about whether you are married, and if not, why not? If it ever gets too much at least I've got my manager, Divya, on the case. She's quite the matchmaker.